The day I had always longed for had finally arrived and is now almost a week's past. It still feels vaguely surreal, the memories swimming in an ethereal pool of unreal magic. Having my parents affix the officer rank insignia upon my shoulders was a phenomenon more unfathomable than I had imagined it to be (which is nonetheless ironic). What culminated in the tossing of our peak caps lifted me so high, that of reality and in spirits, for a moment I thought I could surpass the skies.

But the indulgence in such euphoria must no doubt come to its own closure. Beyond a certain limit, it merely degrades into what is ostensibly frivolous and fatuous. But beyond the superfluous and superficial, there is a deeper calling to come to terms with what the parade (or ceremony as it often masquerades itself as) heralds. In due time, and I believe the time is almost now, all that is merry must take its leave for the weight of the matter to sink in.

And so I am now an official commissioned officer of the Singapore Armed Forces, charged to discharge my duties with fervour, loyalty and dedication to the nation, and above all, to achieve mission success in favour of our sovereign land whilst upholding exemplary character and values. Clearly a task that a simple description cannot aptly depict. And albeit with all honestly I am truly and completely overwhelmed and afraid of the responsibilities that lie ahead, it is hardly of good use to fraternise with such tainted thoughts. Rather, I like to shift my focus to the end of the beginning of my journey as an officer and the beginning of a life ahead as a role model for many others under me.

The analogy posited by Commander OCS could not have been a better way to illustrate the journey these past 9 months. It is indeed a significant course of time considering that this is the exact same amount of time required to conceive and produce a new human life. And as a new life blossoms in the womb of a mother, so have we flowered and matured each and every day of these precious 9 months. It is difficult to track the gradual but constant growth in all of us by observing our changes day to day but on hindsight, there have been so many change, it's almost laughable that we had overlooked all these before.

Of all that's changed, I personally identify best with the reason I choose to lead and serve. Admittedly, my motivation in becoming an officer has always been rather specious but that same drive to lead has undergone paradigm shifts since my enlistment up till this day and fortunately for the better. My family has always been beside me with their constant support and relentless love since the day I entered the armed forces and it is truly accurate when people say that national service conscripts the entire family into the service. Truly, I would not have been able to make it thus far or accomplish what I have without the support of my loved ones and what better means to repay this favour by doing what I do for them. I defend the land with my life not because I love the country (and this is an honest truth because really, how many of you can claim to be pure jingoists?), but so that my loved ones can continue to flourish in this nation. It's simple, it's humble but it's sincere and I think that takes precedence over everything else. You can be the meanest, toughest fighting machine out there but if you have nothing to fight for, your qualities are worthless.

And so I've learned, in the process of leading, excelling and overcoming, there has to be entities that you are doing all that for.

For me, it's my family I fight for.

Because before I am an officer, I am a soldier. And before I am a soldier, I am a son.